I thought I would commemorate my one year anniversary in China with a list. A list of reasons I know I've been in China for too long. Well, maybe not too long, but long enough to realize how far I've come in the last year. Here's what I've got so far:
1. It's completely normal (and expected) to see children weeing and pooping on the sidewalks... and in the grass... and the streets. Basically where ever they are when they have the urge to go. Because it is unhealthy to wait.
2. And, split pants become normal. You know, crotchless pants with nothing underneath. So it is easier for the kids to squat and go. (Thankfully, this trend did not carry over to adults).
3. Whistling isn't something you do to call your dog. (It's how you signal your young child that it is time for them to go to the bathroom. Call it a form of potty training.) :)
4. You've seen one megamall, you've seen them all. And by mega mall, I mean at least 6 stories.
5. You've bought at least one pair of "Tom's" from some random vendor selling them on the side of the road.
6. Taobao, Baidu, and Ctrip all play an integral part of your daily life (shopping, streaming American TV shows, and booking trips--respectively.)
7. You can order pearl milk tea (hot or cold) in Chinese.
8. You've learned to give directions (to use with taxis and small children), numbers (for bargaining), and colors all in Chinese. And you can tell people you're American and a teacher.
9. You know the best time to go to McDonald's is 11-2 or 5-7 for the 15 RMB specials, but sometimes you don't care and you just call 4008 517 517 and have it delivered :)
10. You've learned to either: A. Specify which type of meat you want in great detail or B. become vegetarian when eating at Chinese restaurants because "pork" or "beef" could mean anything... even intestines.
11. 100 yuan is worth way more than $15.
12. You always carry tissues in your bag (and probably hoard unused napkins too) and not for blowing your nose.
13. Blowing your nose doesn't require tissues. Just cover one nostril and blow (yes, it really does happen--you always hope you're just far enough away)
14. Your calf muscles are amazing. Must be all the squatting you do.
15. You've begun to answer questions with noises like grunting and "ahh ahh" and the other party clearly understands your intent.
16. You didn't realize bikes were meant for entire families... mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, and a baby. On a regular e-bike.
17. Or that bikes (trikes) were the new garbage truck... and delivery truck, pizza/McDonald's delivery too... basically everything. Bikes are king. Especially the e-bikes. They will run you over. And honk at you like it was your fault.
18. Sometimes you're just walking down the street, minding your own business, and your friend points out something odd to you. And it takes you a few moments to figure out what's odd because it has become so normal.
19. You're a celebrity. Everywhere you go. Get used to it. People stare. And take pictures. And giggle when you catch them, but that is not a deterrent. Nope. That's an open invitation to come on over and line up for picture with the foreigner.
20. Bu yao & bu hao are very useful phrases :) (don't want! not good!) so is wo liao (I'm bored!)
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